Do not interfere with children to grow and make their own choice – perhaps the main thing is that we parents can do for them.
When our sons were already far over thirty, I had a
conversation with them. I asked everyone, is he satisfied with his childhood, does he think that he was missing something? Both answered without saying: “You told us a lot about the war, about what difficulties you had to endure. And we never had the opportunity to test ourselves. Find out if we can survive if we have to do bad. “.
I remember how we moved to Chicago and my son Mark (he seemed to be 8 years old) went to a new school. I watched him very carefully. And at the end of the school year he asked: what was the most important point? Mark – He, I must say, was always a diligent student, – thought. And then he told this. At the very beginning of his studies, the teacher collected money from the entire class to buy milk for lunch. It seems that in the end the amount of $ 13 was formed. And someone was supposed to take this money to the director and receive paper that the class has paid the necessary amount. And now the teacher circled the class with eyes and said: “Mark! Why not do it to you?”. It may seem ridiculous, but it was necessary to see and hear how Mark told me about this! “I was so worried! I have never been on the fourth floor where the director’s office is located, I was afraid that I could lose the money that the whole class entrusted to me, that something else would happen ”… In the lips of Mark it was an adventure cleaner than the Columbus Expedition! I then thought that if the teacher chose a “brand new” brand for this mission, then we were lucky with the teacher. Because the calls are really necessary. A sense of responsibility, their own important role in life is what children lack today, when they get everything neatly packed and ready to use.
We have learned a lot from our children. We sought to feel our love, respect, and gave them the opportunity to do what they want to do. We did not push them to anything, but they understood: we expect them to cope well with everything that will offer them life. For example, one of our sons had the highest performance in mathematics in the state. In his second year, he called Boston and said: “Dad, it seems to me that I want to quit mathematics”. I asked: “Why?”And he said:” Well, you see, most professors are some boring here, and students are boring. In my opinion, they do not like what they do, they do not enjoy “. “Well,” I say. – And what do you want to do?” -” Chinese “. Great, I think this is a growing economy. And he continues: “I want to study the poetry of the 4th century”. We somehow did not count on this and at first upset, but he still became a whale. Now he constantly goes to Beijing, gives lectures, consults local specialists, because he knows more about this era than anyone in China … *